Dong Mei, Henan Province
I am an ordinary person. I lived in a run-of-the-mill life. Like many who yearn for the light, I tried lots of ways to search for the true meaning of human existence, attempting to give my life more significance. In the end, all my efforts were in vain. But after I was fortunate enough to accept Almighty God’s work of the last days, miraculous changes occurred in my life. It brought more color to my life, and I came to understand that only God is the true Provider of people’s spirits and lives, and only God’s words are the true meaning of human life. I was glad that I had finally found the right way of life. However, whilst performing my duty I was once illegally arrested and brutally tortured by the CCP government. From this, my life’s journey gained an experience that I’ll never forget …
One day in December 2011 at around 7 a.m., another church leader and I were carrying out inventory on church assets when more than ten police officers suddenly burst through the door. One of these evil police rushed up to us and shouted: “Don’t move!” Seeing what was happening, my head reeled. In my mind I thought, This is bad—the church is going to lose a lot of assets. Next, the evil police searched us like bandits carrying out a robbery. They also ransacked each room, turning them upside down in short order. In the end, they found some church possessions, three bank cards, deposit receipts, computers, mobile phones, and so on. They confiscated all of them, then took the four of us to the police station.
In the afternoon, the evil police brought in another three sisters that they’d arrested. They shut the seven of us in a room and didn’t let us speak, nor did they let us sleep when night fell. Seeing the sisters shut in with me, and thinking of how much money the church lost, I was beside myself with anxiety. All I could do was urgently pray to God: O God! Faced with this environment, I don’t know what to do. Please protect my heart and make it calm. After praying, I thought of God’s words: “Do not be afraid, when things like this happen in the church, it is all permitted by Me. Stand and be My voice. Have faith that all things and matters are permitted by My throne and all have My intentions within them” (Utterances and Testimonies of Christ in the Beginning). “You should know that all things in the environment around you are there by My permission, I arrange it all. See clearly and satisfy My heart in the environment I have given to you” (Utterances and Testimonies of Christ in the Beginning). God’s words quelled the panic in my heart. I realized that, today, this environment had befallen me with God’s permission, and that the time had come when God asked me to bear testimony to Him. Having understood God’s will, I prayed to God and said: “O God! I wish to obey Your orchestrations and arrangements, and to stand firm in my testimony to You—but I am of small stature, and I ask that You give me faith and strength, and protect me in standing firm.”
The next morning, they split us up and interrogated us. “I know you’re a church leader. We’ve been monitoring you guys for five month,” said one of the evil police proudly. When I heard him describe in detail everything they’d done to monitor me, a shiver ran down my spine. In my mind I thought, The evil police really put a lot of groundwork into arresting us. Since they already know I’m a church leader, there’s no way they’re going to let me go. I immediately set my resolve before God: I’d rather die than betray God and be a Judas. Seeing that their questioning wasn’t yielding any results, they assigned someone to watch me and not let me sleep.
During the third day’s interrogation, the head of the evil police turned on a computer and made me read materials vilifying God. Seeing that I was unmoved, he next questioned me closely about church finances. I turned my head to one side and ignored him. This made him so angry he started swearing. “It doesn’t matter if you don’t say anything—we can detain you indefinitely, and torture you whenever we want,” he threatened fiercely. In the middle of that night, the police began their torture. They pulled one of my arms behind my shoulder and the other up from my back. Pressing against my back with their feet, they forcefully handcuffed both wrists together. It hurt so much I screamed in pain—the bones and flesh in my shoulders felt like they were going to be ripped apart. I could only kneel motionless with my head on the floor. I thought my screams would make them ease up on me, but instead they put a teacup between the cuffs and my back, which redoubled the pain. The bones in my upper body felt like they’d been snapped in half. It hurt so much I didn’t dare breathe out and cold sweat poured down my face. Just as I felt I could bear the pain no longer, one of the evil police took this chance to say to me: “Just give us a name and we’ll let you go straight away.” At that moment, I called out to God to protect my heart. I immediately thought of the words of a hymn of life experience: “God incarnate suffers pain. How much more should I, this corrupt person, suffer? If I yield to the influence of darkness, how can I meet God? … I’d rather endure all hardship, and make up for God’s heartache” (“Waiting for the Good News From God” in Follow the Lamb and Sing New Songs). The hymn gave me strength. Yes—God incarnate has suffered all that pain for the sake of our salvation, and I, this person profoundly corrupted by Satan, must suffer even more. If I yielded to Satan because I couldn’t bear the pain, how could I face God ever again? Thinking this gave me strength, and I grew unyielding once more. The evil police tormented me for about an hour. When they undid the handcuffs, my whole body collapsed limply to the ground. “If you don’t talk we’ll do it again!” they shouted at me. I looked at them and said nothing. My heart was filled with hate for these evil police. One of the evil police stepped up to put the handcuffs on again. Thinking of the excruciating pain I had just suffered, I kept on praying to God in my heart. To my surprise, when he tried to pull my arms behind my back he couldn’t move them. It didn’t hurt too much, either. He was trying so hard his whole head was covered with sweat—but he still couldn’t get the cuffs on. “You’re pretty strong!” he huffed angrily. I knew that this was God caring for me, that God was giving me strength. Thanks be to God!
Making it to daybreak was hard. I was still traumatized when I thought back to how the evil police had tortured me. They also threatened me, telling me that if I said nothing, they’d have to take me deep into the mountains and execute me. Afterward, when they arrested other believers, they’d say I sold out the church—they’d blacken my name, and make the other brothers and sisters of the church hate and renounce me. Imagining that, my heart was swamped with waves of desolation and helplessness. I found myself feeling timid and weak. In my mind I thought: I’m better off dying. That way I won’t be a Judas and betray God, nor will I be renounced by my brothers and sisters. I’ll also avoid the pain of torture of the flesh. So I waited until the evil police guarding me weren’t paying attention and smashed my head hard against the wall—but all that happened was that my head swam; I didn’t die. At that moment, God’s words enlightened me from within: “During these last days you must bear testimony to God. No matter how great your suffering, you should go on to the very end, and even at your last breath, still you must be faithful to God, and at the mercy of God; only this is truly loving God, and only this is the strong and resounding testimony” (“Only by Experiencing Painful Trials Can You Know the Loveliness of God” in The Word Appears in the Flesh). “When others misinterpret you, you are able to pray to God and say: ‘O God! I do not ask that others tolerate me, nor that they forgive me. I only ask that I am able to love You in my heart, that I am certain in my heart, and that my conscience is clear. I do not ask that others commend me, or hold me in high regard; I only pursue to satisfy You from my heart’” (“Only by Experiencing Refinement Can Man Truly Love God” in The Word Appears in the Flesh). God’s words drove out the gloom from my heart. Yes—God wants people with resolve, people who can bear testimony to God before Satan, people who can endure to the very end and follow all of God’s orchestrations no matter how great the hardship they suffer. What’s more, God sees people’s innermost hearts. If the police frame me, even if the other brothers and sisters really misunderstand and renounce me because they don’t know what actually happened, I trust that God’s intentions are good; God is testing my faith and love of Him, and I should pursue making God satisfied. Having seen through the devil’s cunning schemes, I suddenly felt embarrassed and ashamed. I saw that my faith in God was too small. I had been unable to stand firm after suffering a little pain, and had thought to escape and avoid God’s orchestrations through death. When people leave God, they will live in the darkness. The evil police’s aim in speaking words of threat was to make me turn my back on God. And if not for God’s protection, I would have fallen for their cunning scheme. As I pondered God’s words, my heart was filled with light. I no longer wanted to die, but to live a good life, and to use what I actually lived out to bear testimony to God and bring shame upon Satan.
The two evil policemen tasked with guarding me asked why I had hit my head against the wall. I said because the other policemen had beaten me. “We primarily work through education. Don’t worry—I won’t let them hit you again,” one of them said with a smile. Hearing his words of comfort, I thought: These two aren’t bad; since I was arrested they’ve been quite nice to me. With that, I relaxed my guard. But at that moment, God’s words flashed in my heart: “At all times, My people must be on guard against the cunning schemes of Satan, protecting the gate of My house for Me, … which will stop you falling into Satan’s trap, at which time it will be too late for regrets” (“The Third Utterance” of God’s Utterances to the Entire Universe in The Word Appears in the Flesh). God’s words provided a timely reminder to me, showing me that the devil’s cunning schemes are many, and I should be on guard against these demons at all times. Little did I expect that they would soon reveal their true colors. One of the evil police began to slander God, while the other sat beside me patting my leg, leering at me and asking about church finances. In the evening, seeing I was dozing off, he started groping my chest. Seeing they had revealed their true faces, I was filled with indignation. Only now did I see the supposed people’s police were nothing more than hooligans and bullies. These were the despicable, nasty things they were capable of. As a result, I could only urgently pray to God to protect me from their harm.
Over the next several days, the evil police not only questioned me closely about the church, but also took turns keeping watch over me so that I couldn’t sleep. Afterward, seeing how I’d given them nothing, the two evil policemen interrogating me grew furious. One of them laid into me, slapping me across the face, whacking me who knows how many times. My face smarted, began to swell up, and in the end grew so numb I couldn’t feel anything. Because their questions had yielded nothing from me, one evening the head of the evil police screamed at me and said, “You need to start opening your mouth. You’re testing my fucking patience—I don’t believe there’s nothing we can do with you. I’ve met many people much tougher than you. If we’re not harsh on you, there’s no way you’ll fucking submit!” He gave the order and several of the evil police started torturing me. In the evening, the interrogation room was gloomy and terrifying—I felt like I was in hell. They made me squat on the ground and shackled my hands between my knees and my feet. Next, they inserted a wooden baton between the crooks of my arms and behind my knees, forcing my whole body to curl up. They then lifted up the baton and rested it between two tables, leaving my whole body hanging in the air with my head upside down. The moment they hoisted me up, my head went dizzy and I found it hard to breathe. It felt like I was suffocating. Because I was suspended in the air upside down, all my weight was hanging off my wrists. At the beginning, to stop the handcuffs cutting into my flesh, I clutched my hands tightly together, curled up my body, and tried my hardest to stay in that position. But my strength slowly ebbed away. My hands slid from my ankles to my knees, and the handcuffs cut deep into my flesh, leaving me in excruciating pain. After hanging like this for about half an hour, it felt like all the blood in my body had pooled in my head. The painful distension in my head and eyes made it feel like they were going to explode. Deep cuts had been gouged into my wrists, and my hands were so swollen they looked like two loaves of bread. I felt I was on the verge of death. “I can’t take any more, take me down!” I shouted desperately. “No one can save you but you yourself. Just tell us a name and we’ll let you down,” said one of the evil police officers viciously. In the end, they saw I really was in trouble and took me down. They fed me some glucose and started questioning me again. I lay limp as mud on the ground, my eyes squeezed tightly shut, paying them no attention. Unexpectedly, the evil police hoisted me into the air once again. Without the strength to hold on with my hands, I had no choice but to let the handcuffs embed themselves in my wrists, the serrated edges sawing into my flesh. At that moment, it hurt so much I let out a heartrending scream. I didn’t have the strength to keep fighting and my breathing had grown extremely shallow. It seemed like time had stopped. I felt like I was teetering on the verge of death. Thinking that this time I really was going to die, I wanted to tell God the words in my heart before my life ended: “O God! At this moment, when I really am on the verge of death, I feel afraid—but even if I do die tonight, I shall still praise Your righteousness. O God! In my brief life’s journey, I thank You for selecting me to return home from this world of sin, stopping me from wandering, lost, and allowing me to ever live in Your warm embrace. O God, I have enjoyed so much of Your love—and yet only now, when my life is about to end, do I realize that I haven’t cherished Your love. Many times have I made You sad and disappointed; I am like a naive child who knows only to enjoy its mother’s love, yet has never thought to pay it back. Only now that I am about to lose my life do I understand that I must cherish Your love, and only now do I regret having missed so many good times. Now, what I regret most is that I have been unable to do anything for You and owe You so much, and if I can still live, I will certainly do my best to perform my duty, making up for what I owe You. At this moment, I ask only that You give me strength, allowing me to never again fear death, and be strong in what I face….” Drop after drop of tears fell from my forehead. The night was frighteningly quiet. The only sound was the clock ticking, as if counting down the seconds that remained of my life. It was then that something miraculous happened: It felt as if warm sunlight was shining upon me, and I slowly stopped feeling the pain in my body. God’s words reverberated through my mind: “From the moment you come crying into this world, you begin to perform your duty. You assume your role in the plan of God and in the ordination of God. You begin the journey of life. Whatever your background and whatever the journey ahead of you, none can escape the orchestration and arrangement that Heaven has in store, and none are in control of their destiny, for only He who rules over all things is capable of such work” (“God Is the Source of Man’s Life” in The Word Appears in the Flesh). Yes—God is the source of my life, God rules over my destiny, and I must leave myself in God’s hands and put myself at His disposal. Pondering God’s words gave me a pleasant, tranquil feeling in my heart, as if I were reclining in God’s warm embrace. I found myself falling asleep. Fearing I’d die, the evil police took me down and hurriedly gave me some glucose and water. In my brush with death, I had beheld God’s miraculous deeds.
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